Monday, January 01, 2007

There's a question that I've been wrestling around with a lot. And it's been haunting me.

Am I put into this world for one main purpose...is there something here I'm meant for? Or is God pleased with whatever I do as long as I devote myself to him?

I don't know if that question is worded just how I want it to be, but hopefully you get the idea. God's will for my life, is it direct or indirect? Is there a career that I'm absolutely meant for? Or is that in my hands? Right now, I can say I have no idea.

I don't really even know how to pray about it really. And I don't know how to discern God's will. I don't even know for that matter what spiritual gifts I have. And that can be important while trying to determine a pathway. All I know, is that I have a lot of passion. There are so many things I would drop everything to do. So, what do I do?

In theory, I have a year and a half left at school. The pressure is on. People are asking me what I want to do when I get out. A lot of my friends already have plans. People are wondering what plans I have, and I keep making new ones. Over and over again. I revise everything. First, I want to be a teacher, then I want to give the film thing a shot, thoughts of going into the ministry keep intriguing me, and then I think, "ooo, what about culinary school?"

I wanna open a small forward-thinking cafe. I wanna join the peace corps. I wanna write for magazines. I wanna write for movies. I wanna be a college professor. I wanna teach hard-to-do kids. I wanna be a part of a church plant. I wanna work for social justice. I wanna be the next Rachel Ray. I wanna live in Oregon. I wanna live in Africa. I wanna be a wife and have kids.

I don't know anything. I think that's OK. Really I do. I just don't know how closely I'm paying attention to God and his plan. So, ok, I know God has a plan. He can't plan the end and not plan the means. But is it really so specific? I try to pray about it. Really I do.

And let's say I don't pray. I don't think too seriously about it. Do I just whim it? 'Cause that's what I feel like I'm doing right now. Just chasing the wind.

Will God's will still intercede through my "whimming"?

It has to, right?
God is sovereign after all.



What are my gifts?
What is my purpose? What am I here for?
I always laughed at the Purpose Driven Life. I think now's the time to give that book a chance.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Proverbs 3:6 "In all your ways, aknowledge him and he will make your paths straight."

Start with today. Ask yourself how can you serve God today. Tomorrow isn't even promised us so it's not worth getting too worked up over. I truly believe that by humbly submitting to God daily that he will guide us through the maze of life piece by piece.

Sometimes I look back on my life at the times I was really stressing out just to find that God was guiding me the whole way. That he never let me fall so far off the tracks I couldn't get back on.

The trouble with people like you and me, always being so passionate about things, is that we worry that the moment we commit ourselves to one passion another will get left by the wayside and become waste.

I guarantee that, thought you may never see the big picture until you can look at it through hindsight, God will guide you if you let him. And, who knows, you may already be on just the right track. Don't let the pressure of others discourage you. God put those passions in you and he knows what he wants you to do with them.

And maybe you have a decent idea of what you should be doing with them today and today is a good place to start.

-- I'll give you a million bucks if you can guess who this is.

that girl said...

thanks for that. whoever you are.

and thanks to sherwin for this advice.

Kittens Yaaaaay: ok step one whats God's will?
Kittens Yaaaaay: thats the easiest answer to find out because its in the bible
Kittens Yaaaaay: step two is how do i apply my life ot God's will?
Kittens Yaaaaay: say you want to be a teacher
Kittens Yaaaaay: how do you apply the process of that to Gods will in the bible?
Kittens Yaaaaay: you need to ask questions that are intentional
Kittens Yaaaaay: thats the freedom in christ that there isnt this like set one "right" thing that you are suppose to do
Kittens Yaaaaay: in Gods will you are where you are suppose to be
Kittens Yaaaaay: there is s et path in the sense that you are doing Gods will

that's pretty helpful. i decided to save it in form of a comment.