I should be doing poetry homework. I should be reading for class.

The point is, I'm not. And I'm not stressed. School is taking a back seat.

Let's celebrate this!!

Yes, I am a college student. That involves school as a priority. But one thing I am learning is that school should never come in the way of living.

And it has this semester. That's a problem.

This weekend, I had a realization. In the course of this semester itself, I have become a task-oriented individual rather than a person-oriented friend. Getting things done is not bad. Being task-oriented isn't bad either for people who are naturally this way. But I am not.

I have a short enough attention span with relationships as it is. I gravitate towards people easily but I am not with being intentional. Task-oriented people HAVE to be intentional, or they get no time with anyone.

One thing I lack an incredible amount of is intimacy. I never quite grasped that idea. I like being friends with everyone so I spread myself too thin, not making deep friendships. I am incredibly personal and vulnerable which makes a lot of people think I'm closer to them than I am. It makes me think I'm closer to people than I am. But I am randomly vulnerable. I can share my problems with a complete and total stranger.

I am trying to learn how to be truly intimate and not decievingly so. With God. With people. With fewer friends rather than plenty (and my busy lifestyle no involves plenty). I don't know how to do it. I'm asking God to show me how. Because I have no idea.