Let's be honest. Most of my life has been spent on some cloud somewhere. I exiled myself there, because I did not want to face life as it really was. Lately, I've been floating down to the surface. I wrote a couple months ago that reality is hitting me like a ton of bricks. Now it's not. Now I'm floating, I am not being slammed down.
I am bruised by the bricks. I am still mourning the life I would've wanted. But I am better. Reality is making me stronger. Actually, it's making me weaker. But when I am weak, then I am strong.
More importantly, it's making me more relate able. I am not on some super spiritual high. It's good when that happens. It's good when you get a good super-charge of the holy spirit. But that's not where I am currently. Not like it isn't there. The spirit is keeping me afloat.
But I am more relate able after seeing my own sin clearer than ever. Through this I can better understand other people, and I am less inclined to judge. I have always been very accepting of all sorts of people but I have never understood how to interact with all types of people. I am still learning.
Work has been helping me. Sometimes my co-workers are such a pain. Sometimes they're wonderful. When people used to talk down to me, I used to ignore it completely and pretend it didn't happen. But I won't stand for it anymore. If someone, out of stress and tiredness, says something a little off to me, I might respond killing them with kindness or I completely ignoring the comment. But sometimes people need to know. For example, someone used to keep misinterpreting my body language and vocal tones. I had to absolutely communicate to her that this was all in her head. Starbucks is not my ideal job, but here, I am becoming more real with people. I am learning to take their punches and reply honestly when I need to.
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